I've reached Hanoi (5/2/14)

I arrived in Hanoi yesterday morning. It took about 20 mins to get through the visa stamping process so by the time I got through passport control the luggage belt had stopped, everyone had left and there were only about 5 cases left in sight. Not including mine. But after racing round the whole belt I finally found it stopped behind a pillar completely blocked from my view. Phew! Having learnt my lesson in Bangkok I worked out how to get myself into town to find my own accommodation. Ended up on a bus for USD $2 which for a 45 minute journey was an absolute bargain. Things were looking up for cheapness in Vietnam! Got chatting to a Vietnamese bloke on the bus who lives in Saigon but visits his wife in Hanoi one weekend every month. His English was good and he helped me loads when we got into Hanoi town. He helped me fend off the people touting to give you a lift to your hotel and let me share him and his wife's cab as they were going the same way. Then pointed me in the right direction once in town. And offered to meet up in Saigon once I was there. He thought my journey was a crazy idea. I think he meant good crazy. I do realise all this sounds incredibly dodgy but he seemed genuine enough and as it was me that approached him for help he seemed trustworthy. Anyway got into town found my first choice of hostel, which had spare rooms, and just had to wait for them to be cleaned so was on my bed by midday. Crashed for a bit as was knackered but headed out later on to sort out a local sim and my Vietnamese driving licence. The former involved being told to leave my phone at the shop for an hour as after buying a sim I found out it had to be unlocked. No chance, I thought, despite the shop being very professional looking. So I stayed while it got done which took 40 mins and ended up with a rooted phone with a dodgy looking app installed on it. But I checked it all out and the app is actually nothing bad and my sim partially worked. Had to go back today to get it sorted for data but all in it wasn't bad for 12 quid with a months data usage and cheap calls. The latter involved going to a police station to get my international driving licence sorted for temporary use in Vietnam. This was met by a policeman who looked about 15 who spoke zero English, a lady shop keeper helping out as best she could and me doing the English thing of speaking louder and slower. Queue the start of a joke...A child policeman, a woman and a honky stood at the side of the road... Anyway I left with no info and asked at the hostel what to do. They said laughing "don't be silly you won't need a licence and the police don't issue them anyway, as they use it as a way to take advantage of 'you people' when they pull you over". Great. How's this for the recommended solution. Keep cigarettes and half a bottle of vodka with you and bribe them if they stop you. I've since been told don't stop they won't bother chasing you. And so begins my cannonball run/bullet adventure! Obviously these are worst case scenarios so mum, dad don't panic because no one I've spoken to has met anyone that this happened to. Finished the day off with a burger, 2 beers and 2 rum and cokes for 4 quid on the roof of the hostel. Crashed and burned about half 9 because of the jet lag and got an early night. However, 4.30 in the morning...wide awake. So managed to plan my whole day today by the light of my phone and my many maps I've gathered and my trusty lonely planet. That was in between trying to work out what the weird kind of owl hoot sound that emanated from the darkness was. It was obviously someone's snoring noise but it went on for far longer than was healthy to exhale. I expected to find a completely deflated body in the light of day on one of the beds. (Scottish "taggart" accent) "There's been a murder". "No no they've just over exhaled" id've responded. "I heard it happen, there was nothing I could do". "It was dark". " What?". Shrug.

I digress. 

Either that or they were over inhaling which meant they'd have explo...No stop. Stop. You're over thinking this.

Back on track. So today I had breakfast and waited till 10 for the free 'tour of the street food' organised by the hostel. Tour begins and we're shown a few places of interest, some recommended shopping destinations, the lake in Hanoi, a bridge on the lake in Hanoi, a temple at the end of the bridge on the lake in Hanoi and a life sized model in the temple at the end of the bridge on the lake in Hanoi of the turtle that lives in the lake...in Hanoi. Oh and the way back to the hostel. Hey where's my food! No food. Oh man I was robbed. Fortunately I'd started chatting to a bloke at the start of the tour who had the same journey plans as me and we'd both been recommended a shop, English/Australian run that sold bikes. So we headed off there after the tour. It'll cost about USD $350 but they've got a shop in Saigon that will buy the bike off me at the end. Probably half price but that's at least a guaranteed sale. Plus it includes helmet, spare parts, tool kit, 24hr helpline, recommended routes etc. It's probably the deal I'll go for. We'll see. They did have a Russian Minsk with facebook written on it. In facebook blue. It could be a sign. Hmmmmmm (chin scratch). Unfortunately it looks like we'll be leaving Hanoi at different times so won't be able to do the journey together. I had my first proper Vietnamese meal for lunch with beer for about £1.60. That tasted awesome. But had to ask for a spoon. It's hard to eat soup with chopsticks no matter how many things they put in it. After that visited a few sites in the town. Went to see the big market, I wasn't blown away by what they were selling. Usual market stuff really. Saw Bach Ma temple which is one of the oldest temples in Hanoi. This was originally built in the 11th century but hasn't been dating like the one in Bangkok. Stopped at memorial house which is a house that's been restored to show how merchants in the area used to live. Walked through the old quarter part of town which is exactly as you would picture Vietnam in your head. Lots of people selling stuff on the street. All on top of each other, lots of different smells. I don't think I'll ever understand how 20 fruit and veg sellers in a row can make a living. They're all the same. I got accosted by a Vietnamese woman to buy her pineapple pieces because she took my photo on my phone for me holding her giant scales over my shoulder which SHE put in MY hands. Went to a camera shop to find out the price of a spare camera battery, eating my pineapple pieces and praying I don't get the shits, and then went back to the hostel. Crashed for a bit before heading up to the roof for some more rum and cokes for 50p each and some reasonably funny comedians who were in for the evening. Got chatting to a bloke in my dorm from Mauritius who's been traveling for 4 1/2 years! He's in the pictures. Had my fill of drinks so bailed on the pub crawl, plus I'd probably end up walking back alone, and getting hammered isn't the point of my trip. Came to the conclusion at the end of the day that Vietnam is indeed ridiculously cheap. And I smell. Shower. Bed.